Love, Laura

“Dear NICU Mama, You are enough, even when it feels like your body failed you and your baby. You were your baby’s first home. And even now, they are never more at home than when they are on your chest and in your arms, with the beeps and noises of people and machines melting away into the rhythm of your heartbeat and your breathing.

Your presence is enough. To your sweet little miracle, you are their entire world. They know your voice, your smell, and the feel of your skin, and they need nothing more than your presence. Keep being present. Even if it’s all you have the strength to do, it’s enough.

Your strength is enough, even when you don’t feel strong. There is no strength like going to the hospital every day not knowing what you will see or hear when you walk in. It takes strength to let yourself feel all the fear, uncertainty, and grief of the NICU. To completely let yourself love someone so fragile.

Your love is enough. No matter what, your baby will always know that their mama fought for them, sacrificed for them, and cheered them on every breath of the way. Your love sees beyond the wires, tubes, stickers, and plexiglass - and holds your little one close even when you aren’t allowed to hold them.

Whatever you have to offer is enough. Be present. Acknowledge your strength. Love courageously. Nothing could have prepared you for this journey, and yet every day you choose to keep walking. Just remember that you are not alone, we are all walking with you.

Love,
Laura

More of Laura and her son’s NICU journeys:

“My son was born in December 2019 at 27 weeks. He had severe IUGR because of preeclampsia and a velamentous cord insertion, and only weighed a pound and a half. He was intubated for a month. We couldn’t touch him for a week and couldn’t hold him for a month. He spent 3 months at the NICU where he was born before transferring to another NICU to have surgery to fix his hernias and place a g button. After surgery he ended up with a bad infection that left him intubated for a week and even put on the oscillator for a few days before working his way back down to low flow. Then he started spitting up everything he ate, including pedialyte. After trying several formulas and other changes, he was diagnosed with pyloric stenosis and had a second surgery, which required another intubation. He got another infection but recovered much more quickly from this one and after 144 days we brought him home on Mother’s Day! He’s 8 months old now, over 13 pounds, and has been off oxygen for 2 months!”